


Heartbreak and Seance

by SmallSith



Category: Original Work
Genre: Poetry
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-10
Updated: 2018-12-12
Packaged: 2019-09-15 23:47:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 17
Words: 806
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16943001
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SmallSith/pseuds/SmallSith
Summary: a collection of original poetry





	1. The Fae-King Sleeps

A glass tiara, a gown of nettles,  
a rotten fruit, a floor of petals.

Sin-stained suits, a sword of stone,  
a bloody slash, a shard of bone.

The faerie court of glass and blood,  
a single thrust, a hollow thud.

The faerie king falls cold and still,  
his violet ichor drips ice-chill.

The faerie hollow, silent, weeps,  
upon the floor the fae-king sleeps.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _death cannot claim you,  
>  i will not let it_


	2. Delight's Darling Dies Slowly

Silence creeps in  
where once laughter lived,  
and you are gone from me,  
to places I know not where.

The sun holds no warmth,  
and the shadows no comfort,  
and delight's darling dies slowly,  
frightened of her fading form.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _it lasts forever and still not long enough_


	3. With Every Borrowed Hour

I have loved you on scraps,  
and borrowed time,  
and I have compromised  
on everything I have ever loved,  
all for you.

I have loved you in rain  
and in blood and in bones  
and I have _waited._

Know that I have loved you,  
with all my heart and soul,  
and know that it was not enough.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _tear my heart out,  
>  this useless lump of muscle.  
> it is yours  
> and i want nothing more to do with it._


	4. Cartilage into Flowers

Carry me home.  
Lay me down in the garden  
and fold me up in a blanket of earth.  
Cover me in roses,  
and sing of lives that could have been,  
if only there had been more time.

Let the roses' roots twine around my bones  
and give my dead flesh purpose.  
My cartilage and sinew into leaves and flowers  
for all to see and love.  
And though I still will know,  
I will never speak of what you did.


	5. Replica

You left me in the cellar of the cabin  
where you spent your summer youth,  
and where you laid me to rest  
in a place that time forgot  
and hoped my heart would not be found  
hiding beneath the floorboards.


	6. Burying Truth

My words are poison,  
my tongue is ashes.

Your eyes are mirrors,  
you see too much.

We were doomed from the start,  
and your heart knows this.


	7. Telescopic

I'm in love with the universe-  
and with you-  
and when I look into her galaxies,  
I see your eyes reflected.

The stars in the sky   
become the freckles on your shoulders, and the lights in your eyes   
outshine the sun,  
and I am captivated.


	8. Acrimonious

You try to scratch forgiveness   
out of my tongue,  
and in return  
I bite off your fingers,  
 _one by one._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _when did i become so vindictive?_


	9. Bulwark

_I am still so full of kindness,  
but I am no longer soft.  
All my edges have gone to knives,  
and I can only hope  
that you will yourself to death  
on my love._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _it is only a fitting end_


	10. Chapter 10

those flowers you gave me,  
i planted them last fall  
to grow in the garden we made together.

in the spring they grew up out of the ground,  
wild and twisted,  
and never bloomed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _now i have to wonder:_   
>  _were those flowers, or weeds?_
> 
> _either way, their thorns dig deeper_   
>  _than your promises ever did._


	11. Thanatophilia

I still remember the time  
you saw Death kiss me  
in the high school parking lot  
and I ran away in shame.

Perhaps you have forgotten,  
but I have not been so lucky-  
my body still burns where he touched me.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _I wait by the phone, but he won't call me back anymore_


	12. Putrefaction

I wish I could articulate the wound  
festering between my lungs  
that carbonizes my bones  
and poisons my blood  
whenever I see you  
with her by your side  
where I should be.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _Jealousy hollows out my bones and builds a nest inside my heart,  
>  howling for blood like a carrion crow,   
> never satisfied._


	13. Paralysis

you spit violence at me  
as your hands close around my throat,  
and all I can do is laugh.

one day you will realize  
that the root of all anger lies in fear-  
your rage boils over  
because I have made you afraid.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _the roots of your terror run deep_


	14. Divinity

_you are resplendent in the agony written across your skin  
like ink on pages, like ivy climbing marble pillars-  
the feathers crumbling from your halo  
bathe you saintly in the golden light  
of your own undoing._

_the martyrdom you wrote that made me whole again  
is slowly tearing you apart,  
and soon there will be nothing left of you to hold,  
nothing left to bury._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _the flames of your pyre light my way through the night_


	15. Chapter 15

_you tore the heart right out of me  
when they had to cut you from my body,  
and i kneel at the grave i could not give you to say  
i don't know how to tell you how sorry i am  
that you did not get to live._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _i do not regret the choice i made_


	16. Grief

the stars were once my friends-  
i spent hours speaking to their distant light.  
but now when i turn my eyes to the heavens,  
i am not looking at the stars but the spaces between them,  
searching for your face in the darkness.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _I know I will never find it, but I cannot stop searching_


	17. Eulogy

seeing you again feels like resuscitation-  
every cell in this decaying corpse i call a body  
is suddenly alive and vibrating,  
panic clawing its way up my chest  
while my heart freezes in its tracks  
like a deer in the headlights,  
with nowhere left to run.

what i meant to be a friendly greeting  
instead comes out as a strained wheeze,  
because i never could remember  
how to talk when you're around  
and that hasn't changed  
in the three years that you've been gone.

i miss you. i just don't know how to tell you this.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _i feel guilty for sometimes thinking_  
>  it would be easier if you had died  
> instead of disappearing.


End file.
